There are many ways in which we can lose our sense of self as life changes and I thought it may be useful to think about three of the major ones in separate blogs.
I decided to start with career change, partly because I was chatting to someone about this recently and also because work is so uncertain for many of us at the moment.
There are so many factors affecting job security whether you are working for someone else or running your own business.
For many of us, our work is more than just a job, it’s an integral part of our identity particularly if we have worked really hard to get to a certain point whether that's a promotion or to a certain level of business or financial achievement. It’s often how we introduce ourselves, how we measure our own worth (against our own internal success barometer or against others), and it's a large part of how we structure our days.
So when that disappears whether through redundancy, early retirement, or even a career change however much that has been our own choice, it can leave a void far greater than a gap in the calendar. It’s easy to underestimate the emotional impact of losing a professional identity that we've worked hard to cultivate over time. Without the titles, deadlines, or colleagues, you may start to wonder: Who am I now? How do I introduce myself in social situations? What value do I have to offer now?
The truth is, your value has never been tied to a job description or a business achievement. It's just one part of who you are and who you've become as you've matured and developed over time. Work gave you purpose, structure, and community and change is often difficult to adjust to but those things can be rebuilt in other ways if you allow yourself to recognise that you are more than just your career; that life has so much to offer outside of the hours that you spend on work no matter how important it has become to you. Sometimes it's hard to recognise that because we often spend so much of our waking time in work or business related activity. It's especially hard when our social life has been tied to the people that we work with as well. If we are changing roles how do we fit in with that dynamic now, do people see us differently in the same way we are struggling with at the moment?
However, this career change is your invitation to redefine success. Maybe it’s through volunteering if you're retired or made redundant; mentoring if you are changing roles within the same company, starting something new if you are giving up your current business, or simply exploring what brings you joy when there’s no salary or monetary dividend attached. Taking up a new hobby, unleashing the creative side of you that you've never had time to explore previously can be extremely freeing.
Transitioning from “doing” to “being” then can feel uncomfortable, but it’s also incredibly freeing. You get to choose who you become next; on your own terms. How often have we wished for that when life or work has felt over whelming. Embrace this new opportunity to grow in a different way; the skills that you have learned along the way will stand you in good stead no matter what change you are experiencing. You are still 'you' and those skills, knowledge and awareness that you've accumulated so far are still part of you and your continued journey through life. They may just be used in different and surprising ways in future.